Scaredy Pants ...

Let's just start with first things first. I am not a happy camper tonight. I don't feel great and I am feeling low. The girls are not completely well, as we woke up this morning to find them both covered in a bumpy red rash! The doctor said it is a part of the virus and to give them Benadryl, which is the first medicine Maddy hates the taste of, and just wait and watch it. My back is much better but I am just really tired and feeling bad overall.

I told you yesterday that I would try to post something funny so in order to try and accomplish that I am going to tell you a story that makes me look like a crazy loon, as usual. It's not so much funny ha ha as it is just a funny idiosyncrasy about me. People tell me it is good to be able to laugh at yourself. So here goes:

I am terribly afraid of the dark. I mean terribly. Last night I went to put Morgan to bed but her room was too dark. The light is all the way across the room. I froze right inside the doorway. I had to turn and go get William and get him to put her in the crib.

It is safe for you to assume that I am also very afraid of scary movies. I haven't seen many, but the ones I have seen still bother me tremendously. For some reason the scariest movie I have ever seen is Signs. Yep, Signs, the one with Mel Gibson. Everyone else I know, who has seen this movie, says they can't understand why that movie in particular gets to me. Maybe it is because I live on a farm. Maybe I am just a crazy nut. I am sure that is part of it :)

I remember the first time I saw it, I was literally unable to go outside at night. I started parking my car closer to the front door, just so I could jump out and run inside. One day it snowed and the barns outside were covered in snow and I felt such a sense of relief. My irrational rationale was that if there were aliens on the roof, I would be able to see their footprints because of the snow. I don't even believe in aliens so this was a crazy thing to think, even for me.

Eventually my fear of going outside diminished and I went back to normal life, even parking in my normal spot in the driveway again.

Well. The other day I was scrolling through the guide on our t.v. and saw that Signs was on. I have laughed many times over the last couple of years, since I got over that particular fear, at how silly I was to be scared of that movie. I turned it on. Mostly I wanted to see what all the fuss had been about. The scene that came on was the one where Mel Gibson is sitting with his children and they are trying to figure out what to eat for dinner. One of the characters says "I think we should have sandwiches, something easy." and Mel says "No" and then he proceeds to ask the children what they really want. His son says "pancakes and mashed potatoes" His daughter says "spaghetti" and Mel says "A cheeseburger sounds good" Then it shows them sitting at the table not able to eat because they are so burdened with the thought of what is to come. At this point in the show I clicked off of the movie and changed to another channel. No big deal right, not scary in the least. Didn't watch enough of it to feel anything again.

Well not so fast. The next night I had forgotten to return some movies from the weekend back to Blockbuster. So William asked if I would run them up there so we wouldn't get stuck with late fees. I took one step out the door and froze. That panicky fear crawled over me and I broke out in a cold sweat. I tried not to do it, but I couldn't help myself, I looked over to the side of the house to see the moonlit cornfield. The barn was shadowy. Before I could even stop myself to rationalize, I was running. Running to my car, jumping in and locking the doors. When I came home from the store I forced myself to park in my normal spot. I got out of the car started walking toward the house and heard what I will seriously swear was someone screaming. I started running. I have NEVER been so relieved to see William open the door for me. He was, in that moment, my instant hero.

I don't know why I am so scared of the dark. I have no idea at what point this became a life altering fear. It is such a silly fear, so irrational. It seems like I could just step back and face the realities before me. Realize that the boogie man is not lurking in my yard or under my bed. That I am a grown up and should put this behind me. I don't think I can do it though. I don't have time to. When I get to the situation my body freezes and I react before I have time to think. I just bolt. I often try to force myself to work through the fear, like parking away from the house the other night. I could have pulled up in our yard, right next to the porch, but I wanted to make myself get through it. It didn't help, all it seemed to do was get my adrenaline rushing and heart pounding.

So this post didn't turn out to be all that funny after all. I thought laughing about my stupid fears would be funny but rereading it just makes me feel like a silly scaredy cat.
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In honor of my scary movies topic I have found a website that had some tips of things to do if you ever find yourself in a Horror Movie:


1. Never take a bath or shower with a maniac/creature in the house.

2. When it appears that you have killed the maniac/creature, DO NOT check to see if he/she/it is really dead. Keep hacking at it until it is in pieces small enough not to be a threat to you. If you've shot at it, shoot it again in the head, and remember, shoot till it stops moving, and then keep shooting till you're out of ammo. Then reload and shoot it some more. Then set it on fire and burn it up, this works with everything except demons and spirits. Then get the heck out of there!

3. If plumbing fixtures or other structures in your home begin shaking and spewing body fluids, it's time to leave.

4. Don't look under the bed.

5. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out.

6. If trees, TVs, or other objects try to consume your children, save as many as you can and then get out of the area.

7. If relatives or pets come back from the dead, don't approach them and ask "What did you come back to do?"

8. If you've hidden from the maniac/creature and you are not found, do not peek from or decide it's safe to leave your hiding place. If you do decide to leave, scan the ground for twigs before you take a step.

9. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they do not know, or if they speak to you using a voice which is other than their own, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. (Note: It will probably take several rounds of gunfire to incapacitate them, so be prepared.)

10. If you've just finished running over the maniac/creature in your car, keep going. Most certainly do not get out of the car under any circumstances to see if he/she/it is "really" dead.

11. If you find something that appears to be alive that you cannot identify, don't pick it up or touch it, with anything.

12. If priests won't or can't enter your home, start looking for a new home.

13. If you find a town which looks deserted, it is probably deserted for a darn good reason. Take the hint and stay away.

14. Never pick up a hitchhiker or stop to aid a suspicious person, especially if he/she/it resembles Santa Claus or the Devil.

15. Never speak to clowns in sewers.

16. Listen closely to the soundtrack for hints on what is going on around you. Use all resources available, especially the audience, for on the average, they are much, much more intelligent than you could ever hope to be.

17. Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Crystal Lake, Transylvania, Mydian, Questa Verde, the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

18. Beware of strangers bearing tools of destruction such as chainsaws, staple guns, chipper/shredders, weed poppers, combines, lawnmowers, knives, flamethrowers, band saws, crossbows, napalm, grenades, high-powered rifles, gophers wielding axes, laser pistols, or Alludium Q-36 explosive space modulators.

19. If you are alone in a house and something calls your name, leave the house immediately through whatever exit is in the opposite direction. If there is no exit, make one.

20. If you are being chased by maniac/creature, take off your stiletto high heels.

All Better

Feeling much better in our household today. Maddy is still pulling on her ears but is finally back to her happy baby self. She is playing and smiling up a storm. Morgan hasn't had a fever since last night and so we think we are all better there. We have had a nice day today.

Yesterday my back was hurting so badly that I didn't even feel like talking. I spent most of the day grinding my teeth and laying around on the couch. Brigitta, the sitter, came over around 7:30pm and played with the girls, fed them, and read them some stories before putting them to bed about 9pm. I was here at the house but my back was hurting so bad I just wanted to lay down. I am so glad that we have found someone reliable and trustworthy to come and help me out every once and a while. I really enjoyed having her come and help me.

I don't know what is wrong with my back. It feels like my sciatic nerve, as the pain is right beside my tail bone and throbs up and down my left leg. It hurt so bad yesterday that all I could do was cry. I took some tylenol but it didn't help. My relaxing hot bath turned into a luke warm bath with two babies trying to get into everything around me, so that didn't help. I didn't have a heating pad but went and got one this morning. So we will see how that does. I am actually feeling a lot better today though.

Where is everyone at? It has been so quiet here in blogland?

Well thats about all I have to say tonight. Maybe tomorrow I will try to think of something funny to write about. I am working on a post for next week. I want to write some about the girls' birth story. I feel finally ready to share it online. I think it has been a long time coming and I need to get it out there so I can start to put it past me. I feel like I have been hoarding these feelings to myself for the past year and it is just time for me to write it all out. I also found my NICU journal so I might share some of that too.

Till tomorrow...

My Little Sunbeam

When I was a teenager I worked at my church camp and during the summer we would have a group of little girls called Sunbeams and Girl Guards come. It was kinda like girl scouts and brownies only it was run by our church. Anyway, on the last night of camp we held a formal Indian ceremony around a campfire. Depending on the number of years camp you had attended you received different things. The first year girls made headbands during the week and the second years, made moccasins. They wore these items to the ceremony. Third year girls made Indian dresses out of brightly colored fabric sewn together by the leaders and then the children painted on them and cut fringe. During the ceremony, the third year ladies received an "Indian name" Something like "Lily flower" or "Butterfly Princess" or some other "official" Indian name. It was a big dot deal for these little girls and it was an important thing for the third year campers.

This picture of my sweet little sick Maddy Moo reminded me of those Indian names, and so I lovingly dubbed her:

"Royal Princess Fussy Pants"

She's been wearing this crown since Saturday. She has worn it almost all day today and when I took it off and put it in the toy box, she crawled over to it and tried to put it back on her head.

In The Trenches

Sorry I haven't updated in a couple of days. I have been what you call "in the trenches" Maddy is finally starting to perk up. She is still hoarse and still puny. She is finally playing again but this time if she falls down or can't get to what she wants, she just stops and cries that heartbroken cry. She is wanting to be "babied" and held a lot more than usual. She is usually VERY independent and has not been so at all since getting sick, last week. I do see some improvements though.

Morgan has had a fever since Friday night. I took her to the doctor's office this morning and she doesn't have an ear infection. They thought she might have strep, since her throat is so swollen and red, but it wasn't strep and was a virus.
Both girls have a slight rash on their faces? Maybe from fever? I don't know.
So, no antibiotics for Morgan. We just have to let it run its course. Yipee!

Saturday I cleaned house all day and then Sunday we had Beth's baby shower for Aubree at my house. It was nice but hectic and I am relieved it is over. It is hard to take care of two sick babies, clean, decorate, throw a party, and be sociable, on so little sleep, all at one time. The party was really nice though and Beth got a ton of really cute stuff.

Here are a couple of pictures from the shower and of the girls, to hold you over until I have time to write something more creative or interesting. Right now I feel barely able to communicate much less write creatively. :) I'll be back to normal soon I am sure and then I will have lots of wonderful things to say ... maybe?!!?

Running on Empty ...

It has been one really long week. I am so exhausted from the girls being sick. Maddy is still not feeling a lot better and slept most of the day. I called the doctor's office this morning to find out what they thought and the stupid nurse said, "Well, sometimes it takes up to four days for the medicine to start working. If she gets worse over the weekend, just take her to the ER and if not then we will talk to you on Monday" What? Are you telling me that the medicine would not only not start working for FOUR days but she would get worse and worse in the meantime. I don't know how this stuff works but it would seem to me that even if she didn't improve right away on the antibiotic, she should at least be heading in the right direction, not getting worse. Poor sweet baby has almost completely lost her voice and is now coughing too. She still has fever off and on (at least not all the time now) and she is sleeping almost the entire day.

Morgan hasn't thrown up since the other morning, so that was good .... but .... she is now running fever and so I am assuming is coming down with whatever Maddy has. She started running fever around 8pm tonight and so there is really nothing I can do for her, except Tylenol, until Monday when the doctor's office opens.

Just about the time I start expecting things to look up, Morgan comes down with it. So I am looking at a minimum of another week of this crap. I am seriously running on empty and am starting to daydream of hiring a babysitter to watch the girls while I sleep.

I am so tired and I AM getting to sleep almost all night everynight, so I don't know why I am so worn out. Could it be that they are more demanding and so I have less downtime during the day? Could it be the worrying is causing me to be physically tired? Or am I fighting this bug off too and that is why I am so exhausted? Whatever the reason, I know I could really use some good R&R time. I would love to just curl up in bed and watch t.v. or read a magazine.

We had quite a few visitors today. Melissa and Alissa came by for lunch to see me and the girls. Melissa brought lunch and Alissa brought the girls story books from her Hawaiian honeymoon. She was saving them for their birthday but brought them today since they were under the weather. It was nice to finally have other adults to talk to. Then tonight my mom and Scott came by to see the girls. Mom brought souvenirs from her Vegas work trip for the girls. The shirts were so cute. My favorite was one pink one that said "I need lots of TLC - Toys, Love, and Candy"

Here are a couple of pictures from the last few days. I took them but am just now uploading them to the computer:

Morgan checks on her sissy

Maddy makes her "snooty" face

Mimi and Maddy

Poppy and Morgan

Quick Update

Okay, today has been a better day. Not a great day, but better than yesterday.

This morning Maddy was just soooo needy and I didn't care in the least bit because I knew she felt really bad and just wanted her mommy ... that's me! So she was all cuddles and snuggles but just pitiful and while I enjoyed the closeness I just hated that she was so puny.

I got up at 6am to find her whining on the couch. The girls room is one of the warmer rooms in the house (well until today) and so last night we put Maddy in the playpen in the living room so it would be cooler. Well William at some point in the night moved to the couch to be closer to her and then this morning he had napped with her on the couch. So when I came in the living room at 6 she was rolling around whining on the couch. William was mostly still asleep except for the occasional grunt.

She was miserable. I think the pressure in her ears was getting to her because when I picked her up she immediately was happier. She layed her head on my shoulder and I rocked her in the rocking chair. After she was good and asleep we moved to my bed. Daddy was still out on the couch. When I layed her down, she started whining and crying again. So I ended up sleeping sorta sitting up with her on my chest to keep her propped up.

Then about 9am I got up and left her in the bed. About 11am I went in and tried to rouse her and she would just flip over and go back to sleep. She was so lethargic. William called in sick to help me out. We figured it was going to be a long day of clinginess and we weren't entirely sure if she was going to need to go back to the doctor or not.

Morgan has been fine since the pukefest yesterday morning. Once she stopped throwing up and got some pedilite in her, she was much happier. So she just mostly crawled around and played all day. That was a big relief. Having two very sick babies is sooo hard.

So anyway, Maddy is still not feeling good. She hasn't really played at all today and that isn't like her. She is puny and sleeping a lot and when she is awake she mostly cries the "pitiful cry". She sounds a little hoarse but I wonder if that is from all the "waaaaa waaaaa waaaaa"ing, she has done today? She has had a fever off and on all day.

We have now given her five doses of the amoxicillan, if she isn't much better by the morning I am calling the doctor back. The medicine should be working by then, right?

This is how we are feeling today...

Poor Baby - Morgan Bear

Last night was rough. Maddy was really sick and we almost couldn't get her fever down. I gave her tylenol at 6pm and at 8pm her temp was 102.8 then at ten her temp was 103.4. I was really getting worried. I talked to the nurse at my doctor's answering service and she told me that I wasn't giving Maddy enough tylenol for her weight. It would have been nice if the doctor's office would have told me the correct dosage because when I looked on the side of the bottle it said 0.8mL but then really Maddy needs 1.2mL now. Whatever. Anyway, once we got the correct dose in her and a round of the antibiotics, her fever slowly went down.

This morning all was going smoothly. Maddy took her medicine and tylenol and so far hasn't had a fever. She doesn't act like she feels very good, but at least, no fever. William and I went about our routine of getting ready in the morning. I woke up feeling kinda icky since I started a new medicine the other day. I was tired too from having such a hard night with Maddy. I took a bath, fixed my hair, brushed my teeth, and got dressed in my shorts and tshirt.

William fed the girls. He put Maddy on the floor to play and Morgan in her bed for a nap. He left for work, I kept his cell phone. About an hour later I heard Morgan kinda coughing. A few seconds later I heard her choking. It took about a second to register before I layed Maddy on the floor and ran to their bedroom. Morgan was throwing up carrots in the corner of her bed. She looked up at me and smiled. I picked her up, cleaned off her little orange face, and brought her into the living room with me. "Did that Daddy feed that baby too many carrots this morning?" I asked Morgan while smiling. She smiled back. "Poor baby," I said I sat down at the computer to check my email. Maddy was playing on the floor and Morgan was cuddled up in my lap. "Cough Cough" Morgan said .... and then she leaned forward. I saw the look on her little baby face and raised my hand to her mouth, trying to catch it before it hit me. She threw up in my hand. Then projectile all over my shirt, then projectile all over my shorts and herself. Orange carrots were everywhere. It took some major manuevering to place her gently on the floor with one hand. I had her in one hand and a hand full of orange goo in the other. I went to the bathroom, cleaned my self up, stripped down, picked up Morgan stripped her down to her diaper, put her in the highchair, started a load of laundry and put on my pj's.

My plan at this point was to write an entry entitled "Pajama Party". To tell you that I was crazy to think I could "catch" her "breakfast" (why does he insist on giving them veggies for breakfast anyway - weirdo) in one hand. To tell you how hard it is to pick up a baby with one hand and strategically place her on the rug without getting more goo all over her and you and the rug at the same time. But ... while I was loading the washer and contemplating what a good story this would be, my sweetpea Morgan threw up again all over her bare belly and diaper and highchair. So I was back to square one. I was cleaning and scrubbing. I changed her diaper, moved her to the bouncy seat, and started to clean up the highchair. All of the sudden (well at this point it wasn't so unexpected really) "cough" ... "cough" ... "bleeeekkkk". All over her, the new diaper and the bouncy. We went on like this at least two more times before I gave up, grabbed a dish towel and her and called William at work.

I had to call his boss because I had his cell phone at home with me. I had to tell his boss it was an emergency with our kids to get him on the phone. I told William to come home, I just can't take care of two babies alone, one with a fever and ear infection and "need mommy clinginess" and the other upchucking all over me, her, and the furniture.

I called the doctor and when I told the receptionist Morgan was sick she mistakely thought I was talking about Maddy, since I was just there with Madelynn yesterday. "No" I said, "I really mean Morgan is sick, her twin" In this household, when it rains it pours. The nurse called me back and told me a few things to do with Morgan. I knew these already, we've already had a the stomach flu with these two.

So here we are ... we are having a BAD day. A very terrible, not so good, rotten, just overall not happy day!

Poor Little Maddy Moo

Today Maddy crawled over to me in the rocking chair and was whining for me to pick her up. When I did, I noticed that her head was really hot, but the rest of her was cool to the touch. I leaned her back to look at her face and I noticed her eyes looked heavy. So I decided to take her temperature, thinking that surely she was fine and I was being paranoid, as usual. But when I took her temp the thermometer kept climbing and got up to 102.7 before it slipped.


So I called my mommy in Vegas who said that since Maddy has been so lethargic the last two days (I had sent her an email yesterday saying Maddy was a "sleepyhead") and she had been tugging on her ears since Saturday, I should go ahead and call the doctor. I called and they gave me an appointment an hour later. I called Brigitta, our sitter, and she came over to watch Morgan while I was gone.

Maddy and I got to the doctors office where she was all smiles and such a happy baby. They weighed her and said she weighed 15 1/2 lbs. The nurse looked at her chart and said she had weighed 12lbs in April. So that is a pretty good gain for two months. The doctor came in, took one look in Maddy's ears and said they looked awful. She has a double ear infection and they prescribed Amoxicillian, which William is going to pick up tonight on his way home from work.


My poor baby is sick. I almost started crying in the doctor's office. I told her of how we had gone out to eat this weekend and I put Maddy in the restaurant highchair for the first time and how Maddy had put her mouth on the side of the chair in that split second when I looked away. I asked if this could be where she got the germs and the doctor started giggling. She said "Oh honey, this is not your fault. Don't try to take the blame. Babies get sick and ear infections are very common at this age" She asked me if I had a dropper to give the medicine and I said "Like the one in the tylenol bottle right?" and she laughed again. She said she would get me one. She said "Oh, I forgot, the girls have never been sick before now" (except for the killer stomach flu we had in April, which required no medicine).

So ... she said I was doing a really good job as a mom, and that made me feel a little better. Though, I still feel very much to blame. I feel even worse that I scoffed at the price of the shopping cart covers, because now I am definitely getting one or TWO even, no matter what they cost. I just can't have my babies getting sick with ear infection after ear infection.

This Saturday when I put Maddy in the shopping cart at Target and again in the high chair at the restaurant I said to myself "Calm down, it's okay for them to be exposed to some germs" Inside I was screaming "germs, germs, germs" but outside I was trying to let go a little and relax. But now I just feel like this is all my fault. I know it isn't the end of the world. I just hate that she feels bad and I hate that Morgan might get it too (because they share everything). In all reality, who knows where Maddy got this bug because she was pulling on her ears on Saturday and so it couldn't be from eating out or Target. But I still feel badly about it.

Keep my sweet Moo in your prayers tonight. I will let you know how it progresses!

Monday's Post - Random Thoughts

1. We had a nice weekend. We really didn't do anything special. Saturday, it was raining but I had made plans with my girlfriends to do something. So Maddy and I went to the mall where we met up with Melissa and Alissa. We had lunch at this little restaurant in the food court where all the waiters and waitresses seemed to be suffering from something. They were all dragging around acting really really out of it. It was kinda funny because I thought they all seemed to be in slow motion. But really I think mostly our waiter was just suffering from a bad case of laziness. Then halfway through our meal the lights went out over us and then completely went out in the restaurant. It was storming really bad. The lights came back on right away and we finished our meal and then went shopping.

2. Sunday was Father's Day. We were going to go to church with Tim and Beth but when I called them, Beth, said they weren't going to go in the morning. So that was out. We got up and took the girl's with us to Ryan's (*yuk) William loves Ryan's and I never let him eat there because I don't like it at all, but since it was Father's Day, I said we could go. And really it wasn't all that bad. The shrimp was good and the salad was good. *I am not a big fan of buffets.*

3. I bought Maddy and Morgan these little mesh bag things that you put food in and then they chew on it and it mushes the food in the bag so they can eat it. We took them to Ryan's with us and the girls went nuts. We put watermelon and peaches in it and I think we put pineapple in it too. They were so content and happy. Maddy especially liked it because the food was cold and she is teething a lot more these days.

4. After that we drove all the way across town to Babies R' Us to look for one of those shopping cart covers that you put in the front of your cart. Now that Maddy is sitting good, she is ready to sit in the front of the cart or in a high chair at a restaurant. But since she is teething she tries to use the metal bars or wooden sides of the chair to chew on. This is so gross and makes me crazy because all I see is germs when I look at it. Even though I doused it in purrell and her in purrell, I need one of those covers to fully feel comfortable. After a 45 minute drive to the store, they only had dark blue ones. They had about 50 of them but they were all in dark blue. I want something girly. And did you know those things cost like $40.00 a piece. My mom said she would buy them though, so I am going to look online and try to find a cute one.

5. We watched four movies this weekend. Yep, that's right, I said four. I told you we didn't really do anything. I even took two naps (during the movies) but hey, it was nice and relaxing. Here's the review:

We rented Hoodwinked - Rated PG and is animated but seemed like it might be funny. Was pretty good. We watched it over the course of two days. The first time we watched it William fell asleep (but it was late at night) The second time we watched it I fell asleep at the end. I would say overall it was okay. But I wouldn't bother watching it again.

Pink Panther - Staring Steve Martin and Beyonce. I actually really like this movie. I thought it was a cute movie. Simple and not very challenging but I was so tired that it was nice to not have to watch something you have to think through.

Aquamarine - I liked it okay. Very young. Would have loved it if I was a teenage or preteen girl. It was a simple and sweet movie but glad I didn't go to the theatre to see it.

Date Movie- Spoof like Scary Movie - It was funny in parts. I wouldn't watch it again.

6. This morning I took the girls to get weighed. Maddy is weighing in a 15lbs. even and Morgan was 13lbs 14oz. I was worried you know. Looks like we may have to stay on the higher calorie formula for longer. I will let you know more about this later I guess.

7. When William left for work a little bit ago, he put Maddy in the playpen and Morgan is asleep in her crib. Maddy was playing and I layed down on the couch. I fell asleep and woke up a few minutes later to a screeching baby. She was fine, just standing up in the pen looking at me and screeching. I was so sleepy that I just pulled the cover over my head and went back to sleep. She is safe in her playpen and wasn't crying. It was like when she realized I was there within her range, she wanted out. The funny thing is that when I covered my head up with the blanket and I dissappeared to her. She sat down and started playing again. While snoozing in and out I pulled the blanket down accidently and sure enough she saw me again and started screeching again. We went on like this for a good thirty minutes. I would cover up, drift off, she'd play, I'd uncover accidently in my sleep and she would stand up and hollar at me. I finally gave up. Now that I am up she seems completely content to play in the playpen again. Why do I have to be awake for her to play? Now I hear Morgan in there so my dreams of taking another cat nap are now dashed. :( I am really sleepy today.

8. We went to tour the YMCA yesterday here in our town. I have always thought of the Y as a place for like transient homeless men so you can imagine my surprise when we pulled up to a nice brick building. We went inside, I still wasn't expecting much, and the place was pristine. Clean and huge. They had a meeting, party room, an olympic size indoor swimming pool that had a few families playing in it with their kids. One family even had twin babies, a boy and a girl. They had a nice big aerobics room where they also hold classes for ballet and tumbling, free for children 3 and up. That will be nice for the girls later. They had a CLEAN free childcare room that was big and had rocking chairs and lots of toys. It was empty yesterday because the childcare isn't open on Sunday's. But I noticed there were toys in the drainer that they had recently washed. They had a state of the art cardio room with treadmills and bikes and elliptical machines with T.V. to watch while working out. Oh and the windows from the cardio room look straight in on the nursery so you can watch the kids while you exercise. I like that. They had an area with all the weight equiptment (I doubt I will use that anytime soon). The best and most fabulous part for me was the water park out back. A real water park. When I called and they said they had a water park and an indoor pool, I figured water park meant like sprinklers and stuff out back. If it meant pool, why didn't they say pool. Why? Because it is a brand new pristine water park. It is a huge pool. On one side it is like 1 1/4 foot deep. The babies could sit and play with me in the pool. On the other end it is deeper like 5 feet or something and it has slides the big kids can go down. Big slides. I would say overall I was very impressed. I think we are planning on joining next weekend. They gave us a two day pass but we didn't feel like going back last night to try out the pool. So we are planning on going this coming weekend. A family membership wasn't too expensive and you can cancel your membership at any time with a ten day notice. So when RSV season gets back we can stop going and pick back up in the spring again.

9. Please keep the Hurt Family in your prayers. They are our NICU buddies. They had triplets when the girls were two weeks old. We have been keeping up with each other ever since. We all went to the step down unit together and then home from the NICU about the same time. The youngest girl, and smallest of their triplets, is sick and was admitted to the hospital last night. She has a cold and needed some fluids and antibiotics. The dad said they would probably release her tonight or tomorrow. Just if you can, please say a prayer for them all. I think they have all been sick for awhile and it is a struggle when you have one baby sick, much less three at one time.

10. I better get off of here. Maddy is one hungry girl! Time for lunch :)

Two, hopefully funny, Short Stories ...

well maybe not so short ...

Mission Impossible ---
"do do do do do, do do do do do"
(That's my rendition of the theme song if you hadn't figured that out already :)

Today Morgan woke up from a nap right about the time that Maddy was going down for one. Morgan and I played for a while on the floor in the living room and about an hour later we heard Maddy playing in her crib. I went in and instead of getting Maddy out, I put Morgan in the crib beside her so they could play together. Now, normally when I put them in the crib or playpen together they end up crawling on top of each other and both screaming. So you can imagine my amazement when after about thirty minutes I realized I hadn't heard a peep coming from their room. Not a peep, not a cry or a giggle or anything. I knew that it was a good thing and that they were both surely fine but I wanted to check on them just to be sure.

I didn't want Maddy to see me, because if we made eye contact even once she would surely start screaming to get out of her bed. So instead I got down on the living room floor and crawled on my hands and knees to the hallway. I peeked around the corner to see if she was at the end of her bed looking out. She wasn't. I didn't see her or Morgan from my crouched down state. I stealthily moved through the small hallway and into the girl's room, up to the edge of the crib where the bumper and mattress met. I found a small spot to peek through from the bottom of the bumper. Maddy was sitting there playing quietly with a toy. She was facing me but didn't notice the movement of the bumper. I knelt back down for a second. Too cute spying on them so I peeked again. This time I couldn't help myself. I started laughing, but not the outward robust laugh you would expect. This was a whispered laugh, kinda like siii hhaaaaaaa haaaa haa. Maddy looked up. That made me laugh more, still muffled. I ducked back down and waited till I got myself under control. When I peeked again, she was playing again intently, unaware I was even there. I have no idea why this was so funny to me but I started laughing again. She looked up again. This time I was a little louder but still muffled. She looked straight out like "What the heck is that noise" I thought I was going to die. I burst out laughing loudly all the while trying to back up still crawling through the hallway and into the living room so as not to get caught. I got almost through the doorway to the living room and looked up to see my two foot baby standing at the edge of her crib scowling at me. She didn't cry or laugh, just looked at me like I was an idiot. Yep, I'm the mommy :)

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It's Foreign to Me

Have you ever had a manicure or pedicure? I am sure you have. I don't know about other areas of the country but here almost every place you can go to get your nails done is run by Asian manicurist. There are some salons in town where American manicurist do your nails, but those places usually require a reservation and cost more money.

Last weekend was mom's surprise party and all her work friends were going to be there. I wanted to look polished, you know professional, like I used to look before I quit the workforce to be a crazy lunatic mommy (see first story). So anyway, I went to my local "walk-ins welcome" nail salon and asked for a manicure and spa pedicure. Total Cost: $37.00. I was by myself, but that was okay, it was overall very relaxing ... except for the jibbering and jabbering the manicurists did amongst themselves. It's all in their own language mixed in with some pointing and laughing.

One young girl was in the spa seat beside me when I got there. She was a bigger girl and she was somewhat loud and immature. When it came time to pay, I guess they had overcharged her or something as she got in a little debate with the manicure guy (yes, I said guy) and then they worked it out in his broken English and her very southern twang. But when she left, it was like the flood gates opened and the manicure guy and the pedicure old woman started spouting out all kinds of jibber jabber (I call it that only because I have no idea what nationality they are and don't want incorrectly label them)

They were pointing at her, still outside waiting for her ride, I guess, and they were going back and forth "yaaawwweeee soooouuuee see bing ching dee" I am just making stuff up. It was all silly sounding to me. The guy was making hand gestures and was upset and the old woman was waving her hands and laughing. I sat there in my chair soaking my feet watching their expressions. From the expressions and tone I guess I could tell they were being mean to the girl and talking about her weight and how rude she was ...blah blah blah. Anyway, the sounds that their language made and the boisterous way they were talking left an impression in my head.

Overall, I was annoyed that they were ruining my relaxing pedicure experience, which I only get done a couple of times a year. But still, I probably would have forgotten about it completely except that this week I've noticed the girls making the same sounds at home. The last two days Maddy and Morgan have been playing on the floor together and jibber jabbering to one another. Maddy says "yaaawwweeee sooouuuee see" and Morgan responds "bing ching dee daaa eeee" and so on. It is too funny. This morning they were in their high chairs and William was getting breakfast ready for them (strained carrots, yum?) and they started it up again.

To make a long story short, or not, I felt like I was right back in the salon again. Maddy was squealing and making those sounds and Morgan was waving her arms around in the air talking back. Makes me feel like everyone is speaking this crazy language around me that I just don't understand.

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Just thought I would share two stories for the price of one! Well, I thought they were funny ... ??? ...!

Babies Babies ... Everywhere

This has been a very busy week for me. I am not complaining though, as it has been nice to get out of the house and have things to do! On Monday, William stayed home from work and Charla came over to do therapy with the girls.

On Tuesday, we had the March of Dimes awards luncheon to attend. Melissa and I took the girls and met up with Casey and Gavin. Ohhhh, he is so sweet. I held him for a little while and he just nuzzled close. What a lovebug! Casey looked great too and it was so nice to see her.

On Wednesday, that was yesterday right, yesterday we went to see Miss Aubree Elizabeth who came home from the hospital on Tuesday. William and I got up and went over to the house to see her and she was so tiny. Just so you know, I am completly in love with that baby! She mostly slept all day but it was so sweet to just gaze in and watch her. We all went to lunch together at this little cafe down the road from Beth's house. So it was Beth and Adam and Aubree, Nora (Beth's mommy) and Keith (Beth's little brother), Me and Maddy and Morgan. I think the waitress wanted to faint when she saw us coming in with all those kids.

In between all these crazy outings I have been frantically cleaning house and taking care of two monkeys who are in and out of everything. Last night I washed all the girls' toys in the sink, you know the rattles and teethers and other plastic stuff. Then I used that new "Clorox Anywhere Hard Surfaces" cleaner that is supposed to be safe for toys and other kids stuff. I dried it all good, and put it back in the bucket, and back in the playpen. Maddy was already in the playpen drinking her bottle. I went to give Morgan a bath and when I came back, Madelynn was sitting up in the playpen licking each and every toy from the bucket. She would lick it and drop it and get a new toy from the bucket. William said she was fixing them for me. It was too funny. It really was like she was concerned that I had washed the flavors off :)

Maddy - getting taller everyday!

Morgan crawling through her bouncer!
What a little monkey!

Today, I am meeting my cousin Carrie for lunch. She is bringing her little girl Alexis. I am excited to see them. I haven't seen Carrie probably since we were right out of highschool, so it has been years. I really want to catch up and it is nice to finally be in touch with some other mommies.

I guess I will go and get a few things done before the day gets wild. Check out Beth's Blog and see the new pictures of Aubree. Let her know how happy you are for her, I am sure she would love to hear from everyone :)

Watching Them Grow..

We live on a small farm. William takes advantage of all the land out here and makes us a vegetable garden every summer. He loves it. He spends countless spring and summer hours working it, and his hard work usually pays off. Every year we have a better crop than the year before.

When we first moved here, we planted all the normal vegetables out there and got back very little. Some of the things we planted were what they call two year plants, meaning the first year they don't produce anything but the next they do. Most of the stuff just didn't grow like he had hoped.

But the next year we pulled in a bit more and then last year we had quite a bit to boast about. Unfortunately, last year I was in the hospital and then the girls came and were in the NICU and we just didn't have time or energy to enjoy all the stuff that grew. We ended up giving some of it away and what we didn't rotted.

Some things that grow in our garden have been here a long time before we got here, like the blueberries. Some things aren't ours like the peaches that grow in the orchard next door. But I thought I would show off some of William's prize possessions. He is so proud of his super growing skills. My family even buys him gardening stuff for Christmas because it is the only thing you can really get him that gets him all excited and fired up. If you have a second, let him know how proud you are of his skills. It will surely make him feel good :) and we could all use a little booster every now and then :)

Blackberries and Blueberries


Cabbage and Corn


Cucumbers and Lettuce


Peaches and Pumpkins


But his prize possessions are his watermelons. Scroll below to see them!






Wait for it ....






Be patient ....






Working hard on growing these ....
This one is about 3 inches long.


These are much bigger than that ....

Maddy Grace


Morgan Gabrielle

Think we might win a prize if we take these two to the fair?

Busy Busy Happy Weekend!

This weekend we were so busy! On Saturday we threw my mom a suprise Birthday party. She was so shocked. It was a big birthday for her and her friend Mindy and I organized the whole thing. It turned out really well! My mom is really smart and so it was tough trying to keep it a surprise. I was expecting her to figure it out at any minute. The funny thing is the party was held at Michele's house, another of mom's friends, and while we were still setting up, I asked William to park my car down the street. He got busy with the girls and forgot to move it. So when she pulled up to the house, for what she thought was just dinner with Michele, my car was in the driveway with both carseats visible in the backseat, and she still didn't catch on. Then when Mindy answered the door she was holding Maddy in her arms. Mom said later that her first thought was "Oh, Michele invited Mindy over for dinner too, how cool!" Then it dawned on her that Mindy was holding Maddy, at that moment we all jumped out and yelled surprise. It was perfect :) Here are some pictures from the festivities...

My Aunt Susan holding Morgan before Mom and Scott arrived.
Mom's Birthday Cake

Mom cutting her cake!

Morgan says "mmmm.. Icing is yummy!"

Okay so that was fun! By the time we got home the girls were just beat. They slept the whole ride home and William put them straight to bed in their cribs once home. They slept all night and woke up at about 6am. So from 9:30pm to 6am.

Then today we went to my Aunt Susan's house to do family birthday and Father's Day. My mom is going to Las Vegas on business next week so we had to do things a week early. We had a pool party. This wasn't the first time the girls have been in a big pool but it was the first time they have been in a big pool with all the family together. It was the first time they have been out in the sun for an entire afternoon. Let's just say that Banana Boat Baby SPF 50 works really well. They didn't even get a tan. Plus when I bought their swim diapers it came with a free sample of these little stickers you put on the baby (you can see it in the pictures below) and they change color to let you know when it is time to reapply sunscreen. They worked marvelously! I plan on buying some more next time I am at the store. We had so much fun. Maddy has always been a water baby, but Morgan was always sorta shy in the water. Today she was so excited to play in the pool. She was all smiles and splashing and kicking her little feet and arms. She was so cute. They both were. I had so much fun just moving her around in the water. Here are some cutie pie pictures from today ...

Morgan chillin' out in the pool :) Maddy Moo sits on the steps and splashes.
See her sun sticker? It's a fishyMorgan in her shady pool float!

Well, I hope everyone had a nice weekend. I think that even though we were busy every minute this weekend, overall it was wonderful. I am still looking forward to next weekend though, when we can hang out at home and be lazy ...

In Memory of My Nana ...

To my family: Please don't read this if you think it might bring you sadness or more pain. This was just my way of dealing with some of my feelings regarding Nana. All of it is written out of love. It is the things in my heart that echo in my head when I think of her. Those things I wish I could have said. Those things I wish I could have done to show her one more time how much she meant to me. Just a warning, as I would never want bring any more aching to your heart.

Dear Nana,

Two years ago yesterday we held your funeral. I know it was one of the worst days of my life. Your death was such a shock. I wasn't expecting you to be gone. When mom called me that Friday night and told me that you were going to the ER, I hung up the phone and looked at Melissa and William who were sitting on the couch. Melissa asked what was wrong and I told her that mom had just called and you were going to the ER because you were having trouble breathing. I got up the next morning and went to the hospital to see you. They had already taken you to ICU. I came in and you were sitting there on the bed holding an oxygen mask to your mouth. I was scared but not too scared. I said "I love you". You said "I ... love you ...too" from behind the mask, William was behind me. We went to the waiting room to wait for the next visiting time. We heard an announcement that the Harvey team needed to come to the ICU. Aunt Susan told me it was for your room. I was scared then. Up to that moment I had never heard of a Harvey Team. We went in to see you after they put you on a ventilator. You were pale. I rubbed your feet. I was more scared then. We left the room again to let you rest and this time when they called the Harvey Team, I knew it was for your room. I knew you were leaving us. When the doctor came out we were huddled in a corner and I couldn't believe you were gone. I couldn't contain my pain. I hurt so badly. I wondered, I wonder if it will ever stop hurting.

I miss you so much. The week before you died I was going to come to see you at your house. I had the Gone With The Wind movie you had ordered from Avon. I was going to bring it by but I figured I would do something else instead and come by the next Monday. You were gone by then. I still have your movie. I couldn't return it. I needed to keep it. Mom and Susan gave me a pair of your socks. I don't know why, or maybe I got them when I stayed with Papaw after the funeral. I wear them often and I still feel you. I have your purple "N" bracelet and I wear it to church. I think of you when I look at it.

Thank you for all the things you did for me in my life. Thank you for always making me feel loved and special. When I was little I would spend the night with you and we would eat peach frozen yogurt or fresh popcorn with real butter. We would play aggravation or work on puzzles. I always had a good time at your house. When I would leave you would make me a goody bag. You would fill a plain brown paper lunch sack with an apple, and an orange, a coke, and fritos. We played with Barbies kept under the bed and you read me stories. Those same books are now on the girls' bookshelf in their room, stories I will read to them one day and when I do I will think of you. We sang Elvira in the car on the way to Great Grandmother's house and you unabashedly did the "uumboppa mow mows" straight from your heart. One night several months after your funeral, mom and I were out with a group of people singing karaoke. A man got up to sing Elvira and I went to the bathroom and cried like a baby. I sobbed in the stall till my chest hurt.
When I was older you still made time to make me feel loved and special. You called me "sweetie". You sent me cards when I was sick. You never once missed a time when I was in the hospital. You always came to see me. When I went through tough times you were beside me and when I brought William to meet you, you welcomed him like he had been there the whole time. To William this meant the world, he'd never had a family like mine and you meant the world to him. I think he cried just as hard when you died as I did. I asked him why you were gone, over and over and he said he didn't know why. He loved you so much too. That made me love you even more than I did already!


You were always putting others first. You were a good Christian woman. You loved God and you loved your family. I wish, more than anything, you could have met my babies. I wish more than anything you could have held them in your arms. You could have made them potato soup when they were sick. That you could have kissed their tiny cheeks. Sometimes at night I will march my fingers up and down their tiny legs and I think of you. I hear you saying "Their was a tiny man who walked up a hill..." I love them so much and I know that I learned how to love them like that through you and mom. I learned through you how to be a gentle but strong woman. I learned how to be kind hearted and compassionate of others.

I feel a sense of peace at night knowing that you are up there watching over me, watching over all of your family. I love you and I think about you most every day. I am proud of who you were, proud to be your granddaughter. I will always miss you so much!


Love Forever,

Mandy